The final nail

Cheers

You built it. Cultivated it. They tried to take it away. Happiness and misery. Fear and Anguish. You held on to it. Some times they build you up. Some times they spit on your face. You held your head high and you walked away. A lifetime ahead of you. What will you live for? Cheers darling! What is left of your pride?

Pride

Where there is pride there is pain.

Where there is love there is pride.

You always love the wrong people.

Sometimes you find out sooner.

Sometimes never.

And you lay there. In puddles of tears. In puddles of sweat.

In deep chasms. Filled with regret. Filled with laughter.

Filled with screams of fear and ecstasy.

They fill the chasm.

They fill your nights.

Echos of the same old regrets; same old desires.

People who you loved and laughed with, come back to haunt you. You smoulder and crumble into ash but your tears hold you together. Your memories they burn you up as they hold you together.

Scorn

Where is the salvation that was promised? The nights that kept me awake; they told me. The nights, I roamed in chasms filled with echoes of anguish. The same people who laughed and loved came back to haunt me. And I surrendered. I gave in to the pain that promised me things.

A way out to the eternal truth. I sang songs of tears. Adulations to pain and misery. I painted the world the way I saw it. The way I felt it. Starry starry nights dissolved into themselves. And Suffering. She hath scorned me. Her promises hallow. Her justifications, invalid. My Resentment, self-serving. But I still turn to her.

When all else fails, she stays by my side. She assures me of the meaninglessness of my efforts. The meaninglessness of the pedestals.

Of the struggle. Of the pain. Of pride and love.